March 16th: Henny Youngman's Birthday

Henny Youngman, comedian and violinist famous for one liners, was born on this day in 1906. Here are 10 of his famous one liners:

"So much for skydiving..."

1. I once wanted to become an atheist, but I gave up - they have no holidays.
2. When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
3. I told the doctor I broke my leg in two places. He told me to quit going to those places.
4. If at first you don't succeed... so much for skydiving.
5. My grandmother is over eighty and still doesn't need glasses. Drinks right out of the bottle.
6. Take my wife... Please!
7. My wife dresses to kill. She cooks the same way.
8. “A drunk was in front of a judge. The judge says "You've been brought here for drinking." The drunk says "Okay, let's get started.”
9. When you battle with your conscience and lose, you win.
10. Some have been thought brave because they were afraid to run away.